Thursday, March 05, 2009

The Internet vs Terra

She took the modem out of the refrigerator this morning, gave it a pat on the back and whispered sinisterly... "you better be in working order tonight"

Connection problems never seem to leave me. All my life (Oh, fine... the past year mostly) I've had to deal with inefficient customer service, disconnections, a broken ethernet port right after my laptop warranty is over, and in the latest "don't let Terra get on the net" attack, my modem decides to act up. I spent about 3 hours last night attempting to connect, but my adsl light kept flickering and wouldn't stay still.

Nothing worked, seriously... and as a result I went through the following processes relentlessly. Hence the three hours....

  • Patted it nicely
  • Tied the connection with rubber bands (the connection port is a wee bit loose, I noticed)
  • Turned it on and off again and again
  • Restarted the laptop (why? I don't know)
  • Changed all the wires I could think off
  • Changed them again (I had three wires to play with)
  • Plugged everything out
  • Plugged them back in and out again
  • Threw the modem on the floor
  • Stepped on the modem
  • Threatened it
  • Called it an asshole
  • Sang "Come on, come on, come on Get through it" from Blur's Tender to the modem
  • Ate a cookie (no connection with trying to get connected, though)
  • Dipped the end of the wire into some water to give the modem a shock, but curiosity got the better of me and I received a small jolt instead
Finally, I gave up at 11:20 pm. I disconnected all the wires, shut down the laptop and chucked the modem into the fridge. What is the point in abusing an inanimate object? What a waste of time... should have gone to the gym instead!

12 comments:

  1. he he, nice try btw... Yeah, you should've gone to the gym instead :)

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  2. Orhan: Aw :)

    Rakesh: Exactly :)

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  3. there you were being good cop/ bad cop to your modem all by yourself... you're giving me ideas as to what to do with this craptop after I get my shiny new Mac!

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  4. Yeah, it was a stupid thing to do... but do share the details of what finally becomes of craptop :)

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  5. I hate when I got disconnected more than once. I even shut my lappy off if the connection is like snail.

    Sigh.

    Smile ya?

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  6. I dont know how much of a coincidence this is but I came here for the 1st time today thru Rakesh's blog
    And the next thing I know u have commented on my post:-o

    I was grinning at 3 hr procedure coz its just so like something I wd have done....the patting, plugging in & unplugging, everything except for the fridge & dipping in water part of it;-D

    So did the fridge trick work...shd I keep it in mind for future use:-D

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  7. Faisal: Anooying, isn't it... I think I need to get new wires and a new modem.

    Reflections: Oh wow! That is interesting... Unfortunately I dind't try using the modem last night. I'll most probably give an update on whatever happens

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  8. Terra, send me my referral commission... You too Reflections :)

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  9. lol, hehe, sorry, hehe, sorry
    not actually laughing at your net problems.

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  10. Argh. How frustrating. Have you tried make a sacrifice to the gods of the internet? Sometimes that helps.

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  11. Rakesh: Seriously? I thought it was something you should be honored about... :p

    kartik: Hmmm... I laugh at myself and my problems too :D

    citizen: I will try it the next time around... thanks ;)

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